Paper Route - Dance On Our Graves

How to Care for Your Sherlock Fan as Reichenbach Draws Nigh

A guide for Sherlock fans to print off and send to friends and family

1. DON’T be the first to mention “The Reichenbach Fall.” After reading this post, you may be tempted to gauge your fan’s sanity. “How are you feeling about Sunday?” you may be tempted to ask. But your fan is still on a “The Hounds of Baskerville” high, soaring through life on cheekbones and maybe!Mystrade and I-don’t-have-friends-I-only-have-one. The denial will end soon enough.

2. DO offer to watch “The Reichenbach Fall” with your fan. No one should have to go through that trauma alone. Don’t be offended if your fan refuses the offer, though. No one should have to sob like a baby in public.

3. DON’T check up on your fan too early after the episode. Your fan will, as mentioned before, be crying like a baby. Allow a decent interval of mourning. It’s only appropriate. Use the time to read reviews of the episode so you know whether to be prepared for the worst.

4. DO check up on your fan at some point after the episode. Call on Monday. Call on Tuesday. Go to their house on Wednesday and drag them bodily into the sunshine. Do whatever is necessary to ensure their well-being because they will probably forget.

5. DON’T tell your fan “It’s only a TV show.” You are attempting to offer comfort. Instead your fan will shout “You’re right! It will never be reality - REALITY IS WORTHLESS” and shut themselves in their room with ice cream, internet and a stack of DVDs and never leave.

The apocalypse is near!